Lillian's birth Story

We arrived at hospital at 7:30 am, and they got me right to my room had me fill out paperwork and get things started. The plan was to give me the Cytotec pill to ripen the cervix. It is a teeny tiny pill the place inside of you every four hours that helps the cervix efface and then start dilating more so they can then give me the Pitocin (the drug I don't want).

As of 8:00 am the only discomfort was the IV in my hand. I got really faint right before she did it and then hot and faint again a short time after she took the blood. That feeling is awful. Lol. Thankfully I was able to eat lunch so Nina, my sister, came up to the hospital with some food for Kevin and me. It was so good. I kept joking this may be my last meal for the next day or two, because they usually won't let you eat anything while in labor.

After lunch time things started to slow down and I was getting bored. This is what I did to pass the time

and this is what Kevin did:

yes he bought two model airplanes to put together... :)

At about 4:15 my first nurse Pam (who by the way was amazing. I was so thankful for her) came in to give me my third round of Cytotec.  Somewhere around 15 minutes or so after I felt a strange feeling. Kind of like I peed myself but it was just a little so I said never mind then it happened again and I excitedly said "I think my water broke!" So Pam went ahead and checked me and said yes it was my water but I was still just about 1 cm dilated but now about 60% effaced. She said we may have a baby by tonight!! I was so happy, we wouldn't have to wait until tomorrow and I wouldn't have to get the pitocin!!! At this point the doctor said to go ahead and give me the antibiotic ampicillin since I was positive for group b strep. After the ampicillin was done the sugar water drip was started. Soon after I started feeling the contractions and lets just say I was not prepared. I hadn't felt any contractions the whole pregnancy so I had no idea what to expect. My doctor said I could have the epidural at any time, but I said I'd hold off. After about 30 minutes I was begging for the epidural! lol! I am seriously amazed at any woman who does this naturally. Unfortunately I had to wait for all of the sugar water to drip before I could get the epidural but I made sure they were ready once it was done. It took about an hour for the whole liter of fluid to drip. Kevin bravely took video of the room during my contractions before the epidural and after. You can see them here before the epidural and here post epidural. Watching the video it was kind of funny but you would have been shot if you said that during that time. It was so hot in the room I think the ac was not working correctly. That's why you see my three brave caregivers fanning. 

The anesthesiologist came in with my second shift nurse Lemetria. She was also so amazing, and she was easy to like because she brought the man with the drugs lol. I think they finished giving me the epidural at about 7:20. The epidural was nothing compared to the contractions and I was surprised I was able to sit up long enough and still enough for them to give it to me. It was so worth it. After the epidural my blood pressure went down so they had to give me oxygen and some other medicine. I do wish I had done better research on all the different drugs that are offered and given to you during labor. All I knew was I did not want any narcotics or anything that would knock me out or make me loopy where I wouldn't be able to remember anything. The epidural just made my legs feel tingly but I was able to move them myself the whole time. Since my blood pressure had dropped the doctor came in so she went ahead and checked me and I was 9cm!!! I had basically labored all the way to 9 cm without any drugs. She said once my blood pressure was back up we could start pushing. 

I did not realize how long it would take to push. It was so disheartening too because only Lemetria was in there when I was ready to push so I knew I wasn't close to having Lillian or the doctor and baby nurses would be in there too. Pushing didn't hurt so much as it was EXHAUSTING. Whenever I felt the pressure I would let Lemetria know and she would have me push 3 times for 10 seconds each. When you push they tell you to take a deep breath and hold it for those 10 seconds. It was tiring. I ended up pushing for a hour and 40 minutes. I was ready to quit at about 20 minutes before that but my mom, Kevin and Lemetria were so encouraging. Watching their faces  helped me to know that we were getting close even though it didn't feel like it. The last few pushes were to get her head out and then her body and what a HUGE relief it was once she was out. I don't think I cried but on the video you can hear me whimpering "oh my gosh oh my gosh". (That video is for close family only but it was so amazing to see) 

Ms. Lillian Claire finally arrived at 10:23 pm. She came out eyes wide open. She did swallow some meconium, which we were told to expect since she was 11 days late. She was also a little pale so the baby nurse practitioner said he wanted to take her down to the NICU for observation for a couple hours. Hours??? this made me a little upset because I just wanted to hold her. I could hear her crying and she looked good her Apgar was 7,8. But I still didn't want her to leave. I asked that Kevin and I both get to hold her before they took her and the guy was hesitant. But at that point I pretty much said I was going to hold her. He didn't like me much but the feeling was mutual. =) I also asked to see his badge before he took her to make sure he was legit, it also made everyone else aware that we see this guy walking out with our baby in case no one was paying attention. He didn't like me for that reason also but again I didn't really care what he thought. We did get a few pictures before they took her. I also hated that my mom, sister, dad, and father-in-law were all in the waiting room and they wouldn't get to see Lillian until the next day. Luckily Kevin was able to go down to the NICU to check on Lillian and said the nurse down there was nice so he wasn't worried about her being down there. Here are some pictures of us holding Lillian.

The rest of the time was me getting stitched up. During delivery I had an episiotomy plus 3 degree tear, not great but at least not a 4 and she said I would have definitely torn to a 4 if she hadn't cut me. They got me over to a postpartum room at about 1:15 am and had Lillian there waiting for us. It was so good to be with our little family. =)

I was not overly impressed with my doctors through out the pregnancy, nothing was ever bad but I felt like a number going there since there are 5 different doctors to see. When it came down to my delivery and the last week leading up to it I was so pleased with my doctor, Dr. Johnson. She gave me several options and never made me feel stupid for asking questions or wanting to wait to be induced. She was great during the delivery and I am very thankful for the whole staff I had that day. (Minus the nurse practitioner who was a little curt about taking my baby to NICU) 

Lillian Update

We'll I didn't think I would be writing a 41 week update but here we are. When we went to the Doctor earlier this week they offered to options; give me Cytotec yesterday (Thursday 3/14) and induce with pitocin today. Or wait a little longer and just do another check up today. Obviously we decided it would still be best to wait and let my body take its natural course.

We had an ultrasound appointment first this morning to see how she was doing and there was a test they do to show everything is good. I forgot what the test is called but what they are looking at is if there is enough amniotic fluid still (and there was), her movement and make sure she does certain reflexes, and her weight. Give or take a LB the U/T said she was weighing about 9 Lbs 9 oz. Yes BIG baby and that is one of the deciding factors for what will be happening next, i will get to that in a minute. But other than that she looks good and healthy. They give 2 points for each "check" they do and she got all 2s so she passed. Basically that just means no need to induce today. It was very good to be able to see her again as well. The last time we saw a picture was 21 weeks ago. She has long toes and already likes to try and put those toes in her mouth as we saw on the U/S. We go to see her sweet face and profile shot and she has chubby little cheeks and poochy lips!

After the U/S we went over to see the doctor and get checked again to see if I had progressed any. Of course i haven't, i have been sitting at 1-11/2 cm dilated for about a month now. No contractions and not effaced at all. Like before we did not want to have to be induced but now since she is go on 41 weeks and is already about 9 lbs we had to make a decision. The doctor said she could go ahead and schedule a C-section which i did not want for sure that's one reason we didn't induce earlier, or i could induce next week. Kevin and I talked about it and talked with the doctor more about different concerns and decided we should go ahead and induce Tuesday (next available appointment they had) which will be March 19th. I will go on into the hospital Tuesday morning and they will give me the medicine to ripen the cervix (Cytotec) first and once i had further progressed they will give me the pitocin. This could be as late as Wednesday night. The reason we decided being induced was right was because we do not want to get any closer to that 42 week mark. Lots more concerns, complications, and infections can happen. We are aware that since i'm only 1 cm and she is so big that she is not coming out easily and we may end up having to do a c-section but we trust God has a plan so no matter what we trust everything will fall into place.

So for now we (and all of you) need to pray that she will get tired of being so cramped in there and decide to come on her own. But mostly that whatever happens and however we get her out our greatest prayer is that she will continue to be healthy and have no complications. Let me also say thank you to everyone who has been checking in on us and seeing how Lillian is doing.

39 & 40 weeks

Well we've made it to 40 weeks. Today, March 8th, was Lillian's due date but she has decided to stay snuggled inside for a little longer. Technically yesterday was her due date because I am writing this at 4 in the morning on March 9th. Yes I said 4 am! This has been a typical break in my sleep patterns theses last few nights. I'll wake up to go potty and then not be able to fall back asleep for at least two hours. Luckily I can take naps during the day but it's still frustrating that I just lay here awake.

Enough about that, and onto what this last week has been like.

Symptoms: I have definitely noticed some changes this week, besides not being able to sleep well. My hands and feet get swollen more often and my hands/fingers actually ache. I have woken up multiple times during the night and both hands will have "fallen asleep" you know that tingly feeling which usually happens when your circulation is bad. but I don't know why it happens on both hands I lay on only one side so the other hand is free. I haven't noticed any contractions that I know of. People keep telling me i'll know for sure when it's an actual contraction so for now the feelings to me are just her moving around and Braxton hicks. I have felt some cramping in my lower abdomen usually after I eat. It's like a strong feeling of pressure on my bladder so I will go pee but it'll continue to hurt for maybe 5 minutes or so then be gone. I was more tired at work this week but that could just be because my lack of solid sleep. More naps have been taken.

DR. Appt: When I went to the doctor this week they said Miss Lillian still looks to be doing well but nothing had really changed has far as progressing. I was now 1 1/2 cm dilated but still not effaced. Bummer to hear but I keep hoping that what they say is true in that being dilated doesn't really give an idea of when she will come it could happen fast or slow. By the way I feel it may be the latter. If she hasn't come by Tuesday march 12th I go to the doctor again and they will discuss options of being induced. I have no desire to be induced but I know there are pros and cons of it and of her not coming well into 42 weeks. I pray God will help provide us an answer if it comes down to it.

Thoughts: Am I just miserable and ready for this to be over you might ask?... Not necessarily, as I have said this pregnancy has been easy compared to what I have heard others go through and I haven't felt miserable. Tired, restless, and annoyed yes but not miserable :). With that said, I am just ready to meet this precious gift we have been blessed with and I wish she would just hurry up and come. The waiting of not knowing is killing me yet still exciting. Plus she has lots of people waiting on her  and we don't want to keep the people waiting. I hoping this Sunday she decide she's ready. My parents will be back in town,( yes my mom, crazy lady waiting to be a Nana forever, left 2 days before my due date to go on trip my dad was given by work. but I am so glad they did because nothing is happening here and it sounds like the trip so far has been awesome for them, and they deserve it.) and Kevin is already here this weekend and I don't want to worry about having to call him to drive back here in time in case my water breaks suddenly. Plus Kevin's mom leaves this coming Saturday to go out of town to help my sister in law with her 3 kids. Again though we will leave it in God's hands as his timing will  be perfect.

Best moment of the week: duh having Kevin back in town! But also we had an awesome Friday date day! My last day of work was Thursday!!!!! A little excited about that. :) and Friday Kevin and I got to enjoy what it must be like to be retired. We slept until we wanted to then had breakfast then went back to sleep, ran a couple errands, did a little shopping( lots of walking to motivate Lillian but no luck), and had a nice steak dinner out then came home and rented a movie. Yes it was as wonderful as it sounds and it didn't hurt that I have the best husband to spend it with.

Hopefully next post will be full of sweet pictures of miss Lillian Claire!

Pros and Cons of My Pregnancy

There are certainly pros and cons of pregnancy. lucky for me i didn't have many negatives this go round. So i thought id do a post of my pros and cons.

First i will start with the cons or as I like to put it, things I miss. They are by no means complaints but simply things you don't think about missing until you are pregnant and can't or shouldn't do.

1. Sleeping comfortably: you can't sleep on
 your belly ( which use to be the only way I could fall asleep) and shouldn't sleep on your back bc the weight is pushing down on your organs. The only option is either side. And of course you wake up in the middle of the night and your right arm or leg is tingling bc it's numb so you have to flip to your left which is a marathon in and of itself.

2. Potty breaks in middle of night: lucky for me I may only wake up once to pee but it would sometimes take me two hours just to fall back asleep.

3. Shopping for clothes: I miss shopping for clothes. I refuse to buy anything while pregnant (besides the essential yoga pants or leggings that i wear 3-4 times a week) bc hopefully i won't still be this size for long. And wouldn't you know I find some of the cutest stuff on sale right now when I can't fit into it.

4. Physical activity: I know it's fine to workout while pregnant but I always worried I would over exert or move a certain way and cause harm to myself or the baby. Even though I wasn't huge on working out prior to pregnancy it is something I miss doing easily.

5. Being able to turn around to back out while driving. Every time I back out of a spot I worry that I will not be able to see some kid walking behind me bc I can not turn around easily with my seatbelt on.

6. Caesar salad: I only eat Caesar salads and apparently you should eat Caesar dressing bc it has anchovies in it (which I did not know and try not to think about) so I feel like one of the few "healthier" meals I eat I can't unless there is Italian dressing bc I don't like any other dressings.

7. Turkey sandwiches: similar to above you should not eat turkey unless it has been heated to a certain temperature. Which means I can take it to work for lunch bc I refuse to microwave the turkey and they don't have any kind of toaster there.

8. **TMI WARNING** wiping after using potty. Without going into specifics It's similar to turning around to back out while driving, in that having a giant basketball on you prevents you from being able to turn or reach certain areas. This is also true with trying to zip up boots or tie tennis shoes.

9. Symptoms. Again lucky for me I didn't not have many of the typical pregnancy symptoms or if i did they didn't last lo or weren't severe, i.e. morning sickness, frequent urination, exhaustion, swelling up like Violet on Willy Wonka. But I do miss not being able to wear my wedding rings. My poor sausage link fingers feel naked without them.


Now for the things I love about being pregnant!

1. This may seem obvious or a typical cheesy answer but hello the best thing is you are growing a miracle!! I truly believe this is one of the top 5 greatest gifts Gods gives us.

2. Feeling the baby move. It doesn't hurt but may catch you off guard sometimes but it is so unique and such an awesome experience. I could sit here and just watch her move for hours. Even after 20 weeks of being able to feel her move its still so cool to me.

3. Preparing for baby. I have loved thinking of nursery ideas, registering, and purchasing all of the baby items. Maybe that's why God gives us 9months so we have plenty of time to enjoy preparing.

4. Kindness of others. It's great how even strangers are so nice to you when pregnant. They are sincerely excited for you. I picked up some dry cleaning when I was just maybe 20 weeks pregnant and the little dry cleaning lady was insistent about taking the clothes out to my car for me. I think it may have been a total of 3 items. Lol

5. **TMI again** you don't have to worry about "that time of the month" for 9 WHOLE months!!! Seriously this is one of my favorites. :)

6.  This one is more of a pro for the hubby but you become very "blessed" as some people may say. Happy for him but it also a small con for me as I am conservative and have to keep the ladies tucked away.

7. Another favorite for me is just discussing our sweet baby with my husband. I can see he is just so excited and we love talking about what our future holds now for our little family.

Even though I have listed more cons than pros, the pros totally outweigh the cons!